There are a number of ways to assist if you are not feeling satisfied in your sex life. As the issue is complex, the most important is to identify what you want. If you could wish for something, what would it be? Once you have a goal, it becomes easier to try to find a solution.
The next important step is to communicate. Communication is critical in fulfing our sexual desires and overcoming concerns. Talking to your partner, your friends, a health care professional, counsellor are all great steps that can help normalise and hopefully solve your issues.
Taking the step to speak to someone professional may seem daunting, however it makes a huge difference. Whether it be a sex therapist, counsellor or health care provider such as a general practitioner or gynaecologist – all of these people will be able to share some of their experience and expertise with you that may assist. Often to truly ‘fix’ the issue, it will require a combination of emotional, physical and psychological support and patience. If the issue has been going on for a long time, our bodies learn a response to this and we have to try to change that. This is especially true if you have experiences sexual assault or trauma.
The important thing to remember is that there is hope. There are so many resources out there and so many people there to assist. Only a very small percentage of women are unable to achieve orgasm (estimated at 5%). Having an enjoyable and fulfilling sex life is possible for most women, sometimes it just takes a bit of work.
We have some great resources on this site and some more information on understanding your body which can have a significant impact on your ability to enjoy sex. Please feel free to read our resources and as always, let us know if there is anything specific you would like to know more about.